Writing a Dream

Posts tagged “Mental disorder

7 Days of Prozac (Fluoxetine)

For those of you who’ve followed my posts on mental illness, you all may know I’ve been on a few antidepressants. I’ve been on Pristiq which did not agree with me at all. I got some major side effects which caused me to have a massive meltdown so I was taken off. I was then moved onto Celexa and that seemed to work pretty well for a while. I didn’t feel amazing or anything, but I was better able  to manage my mood swings and depressive episodes.

Last summer I went off my meds without telling my doctors. I wanted to try to live without the need of medications. I was also getting some unwanted effects from another drug I was on called Latuda. If you are not familiar with that drug, it is an antipsychotic drug that is used in the treatment of Schizophrenia, Schizoaffective  Disorder, and a few other forms of mental illness.

I did alright for a period of time while off the drugs as I was able to cope with my depression and anxiety. That didn’t last though. I had contemplated going back on meds, but I didn’t want to as I hated some of the unwanted effects. The biggest complaint came from the Latuda. It has a major numbing effect on your emotions. It does have some benefits though. It quieted most of the voices in my head and lessened my visual hallucinations to the point where I had maybe 1-2 a day. Off medication, my hallucinations are quite frequent; visuals come and go although they are not intrusive all the time and the voices aren’t terribly bothersome for the most part. The exception is when I find myself under great stress. In those times, the voices and visual hallucinations can get out of control and that was why I was given the Latuda.

The cons, as I mentioned, was the numbing effect. In a way, I felt almost zombie like. Next to nothing generated any sort of emotional response. I couldn’t really feel much sadness, but I also couldn’t feel joy. I didn’t feel anger. I did sometimes feel frustration, but that was mostly because of the fact that I couldn’t feel anything at all. If all I wanted out of life was to sit in my room and watch game shows, I suppose that would be fine. However, I want something more.

Fast forward several months and my depression is getting quite bad. My hallucinations have returned, but they are manageable for the most part. I revisit my psychiatrist after several months away. He tries to put me back on Celexa, but unfortunately it isn’t working for me after two months. In comes Prozac.

I’d been on the drug previously in 2009, but only for a very short period when I was so lost in my mind I don’t even remember how long I took it. In the years since, I’d educated myself more on mental illness and medications. So much so that I now frequent the Yahoo! answer forums and take on some of the harder questions so I can try to do something positive. Through my research, I read up more on Prozac. I remembered being on it, but as I said I don’t even know if it helped or not. I asked my doctor about it and he said we could definitely try Prozac again to see how it works for me. Here is the deal so far.

I know it’s too early to know if it’s working on my depression. It can take about 3 weeks before I start seeing any positive effects of that nature. What I have noticed though are some side effects after the 7 days I’ve been on it. One…I’m actually feeling worse as far as my mood goes. My anxiety has gotten bad so I’ve had to resort to the Klonopin a couple of times. I’ve been able to manage though. I expected something like this so I was prepared. Another interesting effect that I’d read about and interestingly am getting is a lack of appetite. I actually don’t mind this effect at all. I’ve been exercising a lot the past month to try and improve my moods and also to drop a little weight. I noticed that I wasn’t feeling hungry at all on the 2nd day which wasn’t expected. I thought I wouldn’t get this particular effect till I was seeing the true benefits of the drug. As I said, I don’t mind having a lighter appetite, but I’ve figured out that I have to watch myself though.

Without even realizing it, I went an entire day without eating. I had water which is normal for me, but I never once felt the urge to eat. I didn’t even realize I hadn’t eaten till the next day when I thought about it. I ended up at the grocery store to get some food, but didn’t buy much as I still wasn’t hungry. I started feeling a little light headed though so I went ahead and had a good meal; some grilled chicken, green beans and corn. It wasn’t a very large meal, but boy did it fill me up. I did not eat the rest of the day. The follow day I still wasn’t feeling hungry so I had a big Honeycrisp apple about midday. I also kept with my water and still, I didn’t feel hungry.

It didn’t take me long to figure out that this side effect was pretty significant for me. I’d read about people not getting it and some who say they did. It looks like I’m turning out to be one that’s getting it, but I know I need to be careful.

I often schedule things for me in advance and have a list of things I need to make sure to do every day like take meds, exercise, clean certain parts of the house…you know, everyday chores. I keep the list because I sometimes deal with overwhelming compulsions to do things over and over because I feel I didn’t do them before so I use my check off list as a reminder that I did in fact do them. I am adding eating to this list. I figure as long as I have two decent meals a day along with a snack like an apple (love apples) or an orange, I should be just fine. The only issue is that now I am finding it annoying to eat when I’m not hungry. I’ve started to make my meals smaller, but not too small. I don’t want to push my body into any sort of shock from a sudden diet change.

Beyond that, I’m happy to say that I’m not getting any other significant side effects. Hopefully, I will start to see the true benefits of the drug in a couple of weeks.

If you suffer from depression, it’s important that you talk to your doctor about it. I cannot say that Prozac will work the same for you. Only your doctor should advise you on the types of drugs you should be taking. I guess I should add this in as well: No, I am not being paid to say these things about Prozac. This is just my personal experience with the drug. If you come across some online pharmacy trying to sell you drugs like Prozac or Klonopin, they are scams! Avoid them. Only get a prescription from your family doctor or psychiatrist and fill your medications at a licensed pharmacy like CVS, Walgreens, Walmart, etc. Prozac is available in generic form and is very inexpensive, especially from Walmart as a 30 day supply is only $4.

Fluoxetine (Prozac), an SSRI

Fluoxetine (Prozac), an SSRI (Photo credit: Wikipedia)


No Suicide Note

Sometimes we are abruptly reminded that when a person suffers from a mental illness, at any given moment, that illness can rear it’s ugly head and take over better judgment. I am glad that a certain someone was able to pull back from the edge recently and is still with us now. People will never seem to fully grasp how their harsh words can affect people, especially those who can tumble down that long, dark hole in the blink of an eye. I don’t know who this person was that came after my friend and attacked her, calling her an outcast and making her feel like she should crawl back under a rock and stay there forever, but I do hope they think twice about the way the speak to people.

My friend was so distraught that they just started taking various medications without even thinking. All they knew was they didn’t want to be awake. This wasn’t something she planned. It just sort of happened. This is how quickly a monstrous depression can eat you.

I find it disheartening that people still treat us as outcasts from society. All my friend was doing was trying to be social when she was told these harsh things. Anyone that has ever sought treatment for depression, anxiety, or even something more severe like schizophrenia when paired with the other two, knows that one of the biggest things your therapists wants you to do it NOT lock yourself inside your home. They encourage us to go out and be among other people. Even if you don’t speak to anyone, they just want you to try and live. We are given a light push back out our front doors. Sadly, this evil person sees us as tainted, inferior, mentally retarded.

We do not ask to be treated any differently. We really don’t. Yes, I know some of us are quite fragile, but we have been taught methods of coping with everyday situations and given medication to help calm our nerves. However, when confronted with major confrontation, as any other person might, we sometimes panic.

I am glad my friend is still with me today. She is one of the very few people in this world that truly understands me. I know I understand her. I wish I could say it was me that stopped her from going to far, but it wasn’t. I am just glad when she was somewhat cognizant, she was able to reach out to me.

I just hope others who share the view of us as a bane of society seriously consider their actions. Imagine if it were your mother or brother, your wife  or your best friend dealing with this. I doubt you’d take lightly to someone pushing them to the edge of death.


Popular Search Terms #2

This one isn’t nearly as exciting. Still kind of funny though.

schizophrenia people

ruby jones

schizophrenic writing

http://www.richardallenrh.com

People are still talking about Ruby and her crazy book. You either love her or you hate her. You can check out her book on Amazon here. 

It’s nice that people are searching for the website name as well, but Schizo writing was kind of funny. I guess people are interested in what crazy people write about. Well, most of us are or seem pretty normal. Just because I hear some things in my head doesn’t mean I am a complete nut. Who knows? Maybe I am.

Schizophrenia

Schizophrenia (Photo credit: Alaina Abplanalp Photography)