Writing a Dream

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Rumbling Heart “Kickstart” Edition

In preparation for the release of 5 new books by the end of the year, I have decided to revamp my current release Rumbling Heart. In this updated release, currently called the Kickstart Edition, there will be several new and exciting extras to go along with the improved story. Here are some of the ideas that will hopefully make it into the new version:

  • A “Did You Know?” section with interesting factoids about the book, the characters, and the process used in its development.
  • Alternate Art and covers that were previously used or considered for the cover.
  • Q&A section where the author Richard Allen and Executive Producer Emily Carmichael answer various questions about the book and their methods.
  • A brand new cover which differs significantly from the current one.

As this will be the 3rd version of the book, any previous fans who redownload when the new version is released and go through the story again will notice several changes that we all feel needed to be made. While the overall story will remain intact, the most noticeable change will be overall length. The very first version was quite long, coming in at over 500 pages. The version that was at first going to be the first version was around 525 pages so there was already some significant editing work done on that one. Version two was even shorter, coming in at about 475 pages. Regardless of the fact that significant edits had already been done, we felt it best to shorten the book even further. While we do not have a page count at the moment, the effort to shorten the book will hopefully take it down to as little as 400 pages. While this is in the higher range of our estimates, we still want to be sure that the overall quality of the story does not suffer so don’t be surprised if we don’t hit that number. Keep in mind that 400 pages would be the story itself and not include any bonus content.

Keep in mind that if you already purchased this book from Amazon, all you have to do to get the new version when it comes out is download it again. There should not be any additional cost.

Keep your eyes open for more information regarding the 5 books slated to be released by the end of the year as well as more information on Rumbling Heart: Kickstart Edition.

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RHcover1x

Withdrawal – Pristiq

This is a personal recollection of my withdrawal from Pristiq. I cannot say that this will happen to anyone else. This is just how it worked out for me.

 

I was ordered off the drug because I was getting significant side effects. I was told by my doctor to stop cold turkey. I was instructed to call my doctor, his nurse, and even suicide hotline if needed because they knew withdrawal was going to be rough.

At first, I felt alright. I just kept myself busy and distracted, but over time I began to see shadows climbing my walls. This wasn’t too bad though as this was something I’d dealt with in the past. The following day, I began hallucinating badly. I could see music. I could hear my hair growing. I feel the Earth moving below me. I could literally feel emotion. It was very scary but at the same time almost beautiful.

Then that bad times came.

I start hallucinating people coming into my room. I knew they weren’t real as I’d had these type of hallucinations all my life. However, they were starting to invade all of my senses at the same time. Not only could I see the people coming into my room, I could hear their moans. I could smell their sweat. I could feel their fingers touching my face. I could taste their tears.

It was as if all my senses went into overdrive. The next day i had a full on meltdown. I began pacing through my house, walking in circles and I couldn’t stop some of my OCD behavior. I would keep looking at clocks and I my mind would start doing mathematical problems with the numbers I saw. At one point, I found myself sitting at a table and forming algebraic expressions. I kept searching for answers to my math problems in the strangest places. I found myself counting my pens, thinking they were hiding something from me. Once I’d counted them all, I add that number to my algebra problem and kept writing numbers all over various sheets of paper. I ended up standing again and pacing around my living room. I start sweating badly and I began to pull hair out of my head. In a moment of clarity, I thought that I was having a full on anxiety attack so I went to my room and ripped open a bottle of Klonopin and took one. I found myself in the living room again, pacing, whispering to myself, almost chanting. Finally, I screamed like I’d never screamed before. I couldn’t stop myself. Then the Klonopin kicked it and took my legs out.

I don’t even know how long I was on the floor. I could hear a voice in my head telling me that I needed to be clean. I found myself crawling to the bathroom. I turned on the water and crawled inside the tub. I let the water rain down on me for over an hour. I didn’t care that it was cold. I got out of the shower, wrapped a towel around me, and fell asleep on my bedroom floor.

The next day I woke at about 6am…and I felt alright. I was really tired, but I felt like myself again. I felt like I could breathe. I felt clear. I looked outside and the colors of the world were rich and vibrant and the air was clean and fulfilling.

Some people say they don’t remember coming off certain drugs, but I remember. I remember everything.

I cannot say that this will happen with you. I admit there were other things that probably made my withdrawal much worse that it probably should have been. I never told my family or my friends about this. I didn’t want to worry them. I did tell my doctors and my therapist. They were glad I was alright.

Desvenlafaxine succinate 50mg Tablets (Pristiq...

Desvenlafaxine succinate 50mg Tablets (Pristiq brand) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Vitamins

Since I don’t always eat right, I take vitamin supplements. I was looking over them all and noting their daily values.

Vitamin A = 70%,

Vitamin C = 150%,

Vitamin D = 100%

Vitamin B12 = 83,333%

Umm…Hmm. I see. So…this is how it begins.

 

Superman logo

Superman logo (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Hopeless Romantic

As defined by (of all places) Urban Dictionary:

1. This person is in love with love. They believe in fairy tales and love. They’re not to be confused as stalkers or creepy because that’s not what a hopeless romantic is. All hopeless romantics are idealists,the sentimental dreamers,the imaginative and the fanciful when you get to know them. They often live with rose colored glasses on. They make love look like an artform with all the romantic things they do for their special someone.

“Angie is a hopeless romantic,she’s always writing beautiful love poems to her boyfriend Mike.” 

“Jack is such a hopeless romantic, he’s always bringing flowers and doing the sweetest things for his wife.”

2. A hopeless romantic is not the same as a hopeless flirter. A hopeless romantic dreams of who they will spend the rest of their life with and what the two of them will do together. They want to be romanced with sweet simple things and the thoughtful amazing surprises. They dream of being loved but also loving somebody. They don’t just want somebody to hold them. they also want to hold someone. They realize that love isn’t just about one person but both people. they are hopelessly in love with being loved AND loving back.

“My friends is a perfect example of someone who isn’t a hopeless romantic. She says she wants to be romanced, but she flirts with every guy. And I mean EVERY guy. She calls herself a hopeless romantic, but shes not. Once she has a guy that just wants to love her, shes get bored after two weeks and then when he gets a new girlfriend, she suddenly likes him again. Thats not hopeless romantic. Thats just hopeless.”

3. Hopeless Romantics are NOT hopeless per-say, but very true, caring, and loving people. They are “NOT MADE FOR TODAYS STANDARDS”, sadly. They believe in passion, chivalry, and true love. They have loved sincerely at one point in their life, discovered what love feels like, and can’t understand why it was not returned in the same form. Hopeless Romantics are usually dreamers, idealists, and sincere, however what they expect in any relationship is a full return for their effort and caring, to be loved as much as they loved. What makes them “Hopeless” is the fact that they are few and far between in todays daily life, and usually get let down in the long run, even though they gave all they had to give, money, love, time, housing, belongings. Hopeless Romantics give 100% ALL the time, and hope for the same in return.

Hopeless Romantic – “One Day you’ll find someone who appreciates you, loves you, you gave so much, you were so true and faithful, you did EVERYTHING RIGHT.”

I didn't write it, but I did photograph and fl...

(Photo credit: Looking for a Lighthouse)

Good Night and Good Luck

I’m leaving Facebook and Twitter for the foreseeable future. I will not delete either account, but I will not be responding to messages or tweets. Over the course of the last several months I have found it increasingly difficult to deal with all the distractions and detriments that social media has brought onto me. I know it is my choice whether to participate in social media or not which is why I am making the choice to step back from it for the time being. I will not post personal updates on Facebook and I will not respond to messages or comments on any posts. I will not post tweets or respond to tweets directed toward me.

I have found it is best for me to ignore all of the negativity that swirls in and around social media. This also goes for any and all conversations I may see in things that I participate in such as online conversations via Facebook, Yahoo, CNN, or any other comment generating media such as chat rooms and even online games. While I may still visit such venues from time to time to keep up with the progression of the world, I will not engage in any sort of contact with any other person through these mediums. If my feelings on this worsen, I will cease visiting news outlets as they too are a generator of negativity and in today’s internet culture, only seem to serve the “Internet Troll” and not the ordinary citizen.

The few exceptions in this will be the posting of updates pertinent to my chosen profession(s) as an author / editor / ghost writer / content reviewer. Any photos posted on either my personal Facebook page, Twitter, or my Author page(s) will be solely for further developing my business. Any and all business related correspondence should be directed to the following email address:

Richardwrites@live.com

Only business related emails will receive a response. All others will be discarded. To further isolate myself, you may not receive a response from me at all, but from one of my writing partners or my producer.

In the event of an emergency, I may choose to respond to correspondence. However, no one should assume that I am constantly watching my email or that I will visit any of the websites previously listed. My immediate family should already know how to reach me in the event of an emergency.

The internet is a wonderful place. However, it is also populated with horrors and unseemly characters that many of us would never allow into our own homes. It is pretty much the electronic version of the real world. Just as most of us would never voluntarily walk down a street in a violent neighborhood, I am choosing not to visit places on the internet that would ultimately do me harm. To me, this violent place has become social media.

In several instances of simply trying to become part of the conversation, I have been labeled as unpatriotic, antireligious, and irresponsible. I’ve also been called various racial slurs that I will not reproduce here. I have been demeaned for going to college and I have been made fun of for reading books. I have been called a “fag lover” because I believe that marriage should be between two people who love each other and not just a man and a woman. I have been called anti American because I never wanted any of our military people to go to Iraq to die in a pointless war. I have been called a towelhead because I said we should not automatically assume that Muslims were behind the Boston bombings. I have been called “Chinky” and “Gooker” because I actually have no problem with the Asian community. I have been told “Go back to Mexico” because of my surname. I have been called a pedophile because I enjoy Japanese animation. Apparently, you cannot do anything in this world without someone hating you.

Over time, it’s become quite clear to me that there is no way to win at this. There are only certain levels of losing. Some people are so set in their ways that no amount of proof of something one way or another will get them to change their minds. It wasn’t that long ago that everyone thought that the Earth was the center of the universe. Yet, so many were so set in their ways that they refused to see the truth. Years later, the same thing happened when people figured out that the Earth wasn’t flat or that it revolved around the sun. Again, people were in denial over this. Nowadays, we see these things and accept them as fact because scientists have studied and proved them to be true.

For most people, you are either one way or another. There is no room for middle ground.

It is because of these things that I am choosing to no longer be part of the conversation. If any of my past statements didn’t sit well with you, consider this a gift as you won’t have to hear from me for an extended period of time. If you never noticed me before, you’ll not realize I am gone now and your life will not change. Very few people will actually care that I am no longer around. I can think of maybe two who might see my exit as negative. Sadly, most will either not care or actually be happy that I am no longer around. Again, consider it a gift.

If and when I come back, it will be on my own accord and not because of anyone else. I am not doing this for anyone else. I am doing this for myself. I want to do the things I love such as reading, writing, painting, drawing, and going back to college. I don’t want people to call me insane or make fun of me because I suffer from mental illness. My doctors have previously encouraged me to be more social and to go out more. In this case, I have to dismiss their suggestions and concentrate on just being me and not exposing myself to a group of hateful people who do not even realize they are prejudice.

I know people may read this and assume I am lumping everyone together. I am not. I never have. It would be like me saying something like “The world is full of bad parents.” People are offended by this. They never take the time to think about the statement. They never sit and think to themselves “Am I a bad parent?” They immediately assume I am talking about everyone. Why don’t they take the time to review their own record?

Do you raise your children to be good and honest people? Do you care for you kids? Do you feed them, cloth them? Take them to school? If so, then the above statement doesn’t apply to you. So, why are you offended?

Are you part of a group of hateful and prejudice people? If not, you should not be offended by my statement. If you are, then that is not my problem. It is yours and you need to look inside yourself and figure it out.

It is with this that I am signing off of social media. I do not know if or when I may return. Until then, I leave you with the words of Edward R. Murrow. Goodnight and good luck.

edwardrmurrow

Ladies and Gentleman, I Give You…Americans!

And these, my worldly friends, are Americans.

Notice the immaturity in their responses as well as their unwillingness to see more than 5 minutes in front of them. Yes, the American is an interesting creature; one that votes for a president because they affiliate themselves with a political party and not because that candidate has their best interests in mind.

Yes, Americans…more than willing to say that everyone should follow a certain set of rules…except themselves, of course. Special exceptions for them!

Oh, yes. Americans…so upset about supposedly nothing being done to lower the deficit, yet refuse to do anything about it themselves. Indeed, they are a strange people. Only they would immediately assume a Muslim or an Asian was responsible for the bombings in Boston with absolutely NO proof.

Only they would disrespect the office of their leader by offering him snide remarks and heckles instead of actually calling or writing their own senators and congressmen to take part in the democratic process. And yes, they will mock me as well for saying these truths and still not offer any solutions to the problems we face in our country today…like perhaps seeing the bigger picture on things like abortion where we should respect that fact that it is the woman’s decision to have the procedure or not and none of their business. After all, I don’t walk into their homes and tell them how to live or what to believe in. Heck, if I did, they would probably shoot me…which would be fine because they might have seen me as a threat…which is strange because although they have the right to shoot me if i enter their home, a gay couple has no recourse when they tell them they cannot get married.

And why can they not get married? The bible, that’s why! Yes! Americans look to a 2 thousand year old text; a collection of stories passed down for generations and still try to apply all the rules in it to life as if it applied today. They say no! You cannot marry because in the bible it says a man shall never lie with another man as he does a woman. And yes, only Americans would then conveniently ignore the part where is says we should sell our daughters into slavery. They’ve also cherry picked a few other things that they think we should ALL follow, even though not all of us follow that religion, but hey…they’re AMERICANS so we should never question THEIR ideas, right?

Only within America is it considered bad to, god forbid, change your mind about something! That’s right, folks! Only in America do you get branded with the name “Flip Flopper” for changing the way you see the world…unless you go from disagreeing with them TO agreeing with them. Apparently, that is just fine.

An interesting and sometimes hilarious bunch, these Americans are! Only they would take to Twitter after seeing the movie Olympus Has Fallen and begin spouting hateful things like “Fuck all the gooks!” and “Fucking Asians should all die! Kill them all!” and think it were perfectly fine. After all, hey! Freedom of speech, right? That means I can say anything I want, right? In America, we’re free to do what we want , too! In fact, one could say those are one in the same…but then again, just because I have the freedom to run full speed into a cactus doesn’t make it a good idea. The same can be applied to freedom of speech. Sure, you can say anything you want…but should you? Calling for all Asians to be killed is technically freedom of speech…but wait…we have Asian Americans. Should we kill all them, too? Guess that’s not such a good idea after all…so let’s instead say KILL ALL THE MUSLIMS!

But wait…there are Muslims that are also American citizens. Should we kill them as well?

But hey, this is still America! A country where if the terrorist is white it must mean he is mentally ill…or it was the fault of violent video games or metal music. Yeah, that must be it… because if the terrorist was brown it MUST mean he just hates America and therefore he and everyone like him should die! Right?

In American…right?

So, I hope you all enjoyed the tour as much as I did. I’ve done this tour a handful of times and I must say, I still find myself surprised at the end of it! Americans…so quick to judge, so quick to bash others, so quick to tell all the “niggers” to go home…even though the white man brought them all here by force. Hold on, I need to look up the word irony.

Ah, yes! Here we go! Irony! Bitching and complaining that American jobs are leaving the country…while at the same time complaining that the Chinese-made goods at Wal-mart are still too expensive.

Oh, those crazy Americans! I always have to deal with their petty threats. They’re always saying I’m unpatriotic by saying these things and they feel the need to make the same old threats to me. One even told me that if I loved China so much, why don’t I just move there…posted from his Chinese-made iPhone.

american-flag-2a

Boston Marathon Bombings – My Response

I was having a discussion on Facebook with some friends over how people tend to automatically assume it was someone from the middle east or an asian that set off those bombs (some very interesting tweets). We were exploring the fact that a ton of people have already assumed that it was a foreigner and not a white terrorist. My friend pointed me to a very interesting article (written by a white guy) that talks about how no one thinks that a white person could have perpetrated this latest violence. Here is one of my responses during our conversation:

“We like to think of ourselves as enlightened, but as a country, we’re not. There are still so many people out there ready to jump to conclusions about who did it. They always want to blame people from the middle east or in some cases, Asians. Absolutely no proof, yet they’ve already made up their minds. I read the story you linked to about white privilege and I have to say it rings very true. People seem to ignore the fact that we’ve had a very large number of white terrorists in our country, yet conveniently forget about them when something like the Boston bombings happens. I find it even more disturbing that the Colorado movie theater shooting was done by a white guy, yet they don’t mention that he’s a white terrorist. They blame guns or they blame mental illness. They never mention that he might be a white guy who just wants to kill as many people as possible. Same thing with the shootings at Sandy Hook. A white guy, but it’s the fault of the guns. Columbine High School, two white kids go crazy and shoot up their school and kill teachers and students, yet again, they blame guns and metal music. The only time race is EVER a factor is when the person doing the mass killing is not white. When we find out who did these latest bombings, I can tell you this. If he’s white, no one will say a thing about him being white. If he turns out to be practically any other race, you can bet your house that someone is going to play the race card and try to say “I told you so.””

English: Hope Columbine Memorial Library at Co...

English: Hope Columbine Memorial Library at Columbine High School in Columbine, Colorado. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The Gun Debate

 

Here is a Facebook response I posted to someone arguing about pro-gun legislation and about how the government is now trying to limit how and what guns are available.

 

“Most people are looking at this as sort of like the bible. Many people do not live by things written in a 2000 year old text. Sure, it has some moral lessons in it, but for the most part it is not followed today word for word. Not even close. (We don’t sell our daughters into slavery anymore) The same can be said about any government constitution. When it was written, they did not have the same problems that we do now. The world has changed. Back when this was written, they did not have fully automatic weapons or magazines that could hold a massive amount of ammunition. People are hating on the AR-15 lately. Pro gun people say it is not an assault rifle, yet I know a guy who can, with a few minor changes, make it fully automatic. Adjustments will always have to be made to things like laws because the world is always changing. Not too long ago, minorities were not allowed to sit in the front of the bus in many places in our country. That has changed. The same for women. With out the suffrage movement, women would still be without a voice in this country. Instead of holding steadfastly to an old rule, why not offer ways to improve it and adapt it to the world today? Many pro gunners reject the changes to the laws outright without offering any suggestions of their own, no original ideas. I am neither for or against guns. I think they serve a purpose so I am not arguing for or against any sort of ban. What I am saying is we need to have a real discussion or this will never be resolved. Until both parties are willing to sit and talk it out, this will go on pretty much forever. We get angry at our senators and congressmen when a budget doesn’t get passed, yet pro and anti gunners are doing the exact same thing with this issue…barking real loud, but not solving a thing.”

 

R. Allen

 

Johnson Automatic Rifle (in Center)

Johnson Automatic Rifle (in Center) (Photo credit: neepster)

Heroes and Bad Reviews

Sometimes distractions can lead us away from our goals. Often times I find myself getting tunnel vision when I am writing an idea and that’s not always the best thing. For the stories I am developing, I had a point A to point B plan and that was not the way it should have been. There is more to a great book than who, what, when, where, and why. An explanation can be developed from those, but not a great story. Sometimes stepping away and doing other things can help you reclaim your idea from a narrow vision and assist you in turning a good idea into an magnificent book.

In October, I purposely stepped away from my stories and kept myself from writing. Why? I felt like I was becoming bored with the process. I still had idea I knew were good, but I felt like something was lacking in my writing. I needed to find a way to develop more than just an A to B story. My first book Rumbling Heart was more than an A to B story and it shows in the quality of the development not only of the work, but also the characters and the atmosphere. Sometimes reading a book can help you reevaluate and refocus on what you are trying to do. In my case though, being able to now see things from a different angle is a double-edged sword.

I looked over my work and even over some reviews and bits of feed back I have gotten over my work. The good reviews are always nice, but it is the bad reviews that always stick with you. Why? Just human nature I suppose. Here is a snippet of a negative review RH got and my response to it.

reviewNegative reviews happen. There is no way around it. Being a writer I accept that and I know there will always be people who either do not understand my work or, for whatever reason, want to find reasons to make it seem as if I did a huge disservice to the human race. I did find it interesting that this person thought her review was constructive. You can see my response to her review in the photo as well. Her response was once again nonconstructive. I liken this review to calling someone names because that is essentially what they did. If you feel the need to call me (or my work) “stupid” without offering any reason as to why you felt that way or any way to improve it, the review is completely pointless. Offering no way to improve on something is about as bad as crying because you didn’t get your way. If I were a coach and I told a child they were terrible at football or whatever other sport I was coaching them in, I wouldn’t remain a coach very long. Obviously you cannot really liken coaching to reviewing a book or a movie or whatever else you can give feedback on. Reviewers aren’t coaches. I realize that. But at the same time people who do offer feedback need to understand that the main reason you give feedback, be it positive, negative, or mixed, is so people who develop their ideas can improve and make things better the next time around. What is the point of simply calling people or their work names? Sounds to me like certain individuals either lack the ability to express themselves or they feel the need to tear someone down.

Success also breeds negativity.

I will not say I am very successful. I haven’t sold a ton of books and I haven’t made all kinds of money at this. It was never really about money anyway. I have over the last year and a half gotten hurtful messages and emails from people who see that I was somehow able to hash it out and write a book. Not many people can say they’ve done that. Sure, some people can write a small story, but my first book was 475+ pages. A little long, but anyone has to admit that writing a book of that size takes time and commitment. My followup to my first book is much shorter, but still comes in at about 300 pages. No small feat. Another big story for me which is about 70% complete will probably come in at about 275 pages. Again, not many people in the world can say they can sit down and accomplish such a thing. I am not saying I should automatically get a great review for the effort, but I would hope that people like me…artists…deserve at the very least a review explaining exactly why our work is either good, bad, or mixed.

A good review does not always have to be positive. If you gave me 1 or 2 stars, but explained why this or that was unappealing to you, I could respect that. Not offering any explanation whatsoever makes me think the person is either just looking to be mean or trolling. In a way, they are kind of the same thing.

If you are a reviewer like I am from time to time, do the artist a favor and explain why you think one way or another. In the end, we will thank you for it and so will other readers.

 

 

Stop Blaming Obama for Your Problems

Here is a picture I saw on Facebook a little earlier today. Take a good look. I am sure you will react to it.

A picture I saw on Facebook

A picture I saw on Facebook

Interesting, isn’t it.

I have found that often it’s pointless to engage in a discussion about politics with anyone as it only ends with people spouting nonsense and not sticking to the actually facts. I am not just talking about a snapshot in time as this picture depicts. I am talking about real facts. The ones you have to go and search around for to really understand. Sadly, I found that most people looked at this picture and felt that since he was president, Obama is to blame for it. I couldn’t believe people were so short sighted and seemed to have a massive case of tunnel vision. Not that it will change anyone’s mind, but this is what I felt I had to write on this picture as a response.

” What people will not tell you is the reason that gas was so low at the time was because people were anticipating big changes with Obama coming into office which is why it fell so precipitously. No one mentions that 6-7 months earlier it was as high as $4.10 a gallon under Bush. Over the last 15 years, gas prices have been like a roller coaster and that will not change just because a new president is in office since oil is so global. Also what people will not tell you is the rate of mortgage loans is higher now because the economy was so in the toilet with bush in office that the federal reserve was slashing interest rates to try and boost the economy. A higher rate denotes that there was some recovery and now banks are able to charge more because we are all doing a little better. A 5% food cost increase seems about right and since it is tied in with gas prices, you can see why it’s higher. Notice it does not mention what is considered “High Unemployment.” It also does not mention what criteria is used for the “Misery Index.” The US debt is higher now because there was no long term plan to pay it off when Bush left office. A majority of the additional amounts come from interest on that 10.6 trillion. Again, no one mentions that. You cannot give everyone a tax break and expect the dept to not balloon which is what Bush did, again to try and improve the economy. The value of a home is also tied into the value of the US dollar. Our money took a hit because of various factors, including our debt amount and the credit downgrade we suffered. There was also no mention of what is considered “long term unemployment.” It seems to me that posts like this are aimed at people who barely made it out of high school or not at all. Anyone with at least a little college or common sense can see through this. Also, if you truly want to see the debt get cut big time, stop arguing about paying a slightly higher tax. Notice that there are so many extremely rich people like Bill Gates and Warren Buffet that actually want to pay more taxes, yet those bills never get passed. If it meant paying down the debt and ensuring social programs, we should gladly pay $4-5 more dollars per check to get it done. If you don’t want to do that, then how exactly are you helping to pay it down? This is our country and it is our responsibility to pay this debt down. Ours because we put these people into office and we need to hold them accountable. To put the blame on one man is childish and small minded. Not a single republican wanted to try and help pass a budget deal unless they looked like the heroes and not a single democrat wanted to make reasonable concessions. These are the people we all put in office. Stop blaming one man and put the blame where it belongs: On all of us. Grow up and take some responsibility. I may be sick, but even I can see the hypocrisy here.”